A Day in the Life
by Azlea
Summary: Melanie and Bruce have worked out their anger and commitment issues. Or have they? Life as a member of the Avengers is crazy, and these two will only manage if they take it one day at a time. Series of Melanie and Bruce oneshots/drabbles, with guest appearances from the other Avengers. Takes place after Ch. 13 of Beauty is a Beast. Rated T due to pissed off women.
1. Day 1: The Laptop

**So, since I have extremely terrible writer's block on my Captain story, and because I've been meaning to put this story up anyway, and also because my laptop has a virus so I can't put up the chapter of For the Love of the Captain that I did have finished; I decided to make this. Just a bunch of random days in the life of Bruce and Mel.**

**This first one was actually the little drabble that spawned Beauty is a Beast, and was written while on an airplane headed to Disneyland. If it seems weird or strange, well, I hadn't slept in over twenty-four hours.**

**Enjoy!**

"Oh dear God," Natasha muttered as she watched Bruce Banner replaced by the 'other guy.' "I just bought that lamp," she added as her lamp was thrown against a wall and smashed to pieces. Clint chuckled.

"I told Stark not to do that," Steve said. Natasha and Clint shook their heads, fighting smiles.

"That's probably why he did it," Natasha said. Steve sighed.

"Where is Melanie when you need her?" Clint mused, scratching his chin.

"Right here!" called a smooth, sweet voice. The three superheros turned to see their savior, a tall, tanned supermodel-type blonde with light blue eyes. Her hair was pulled back in a bun, though strands of gold hair had fallen out and hung down, framing her face; and she was wearing a black tank top, rainbow tutu, rainbow suspenders, spankees, and six-inch stilletto heels. She smiled. "I got this, guys."

"Love the outfit!" Tony called from the other end of the room. Melanie smiled.

"Thank you!" she yelled back, and strutted over to the Hulk, who was fighting with Thor. "Bruce, hun I know you can hear me," she said soothingly, stepping between him and Thor. She held her hands out to him, palms up. "Please calm down. And you'd better set down my laptop nice and getle, or I'll kill you, and no amount of gamma radiation will save you from me, mister."

Hulk tilted his head, and lowered the laptop. Melanie took it, smiling, and set it to the sie so she could take one of his hands in both of her own. "Now, don't crush me," she said, jumping up to wrap her arms around his neck and kiss his cheek.

"Oh, one more thing. You owe me a new x-box."

**So, I'll be updating this whenever inspiration has struck and given me a brilliant idea. I'll try to get at least one chapter up a week, but we all know how that goes for me...**

**In other news, my Thanksgiving turkey weighs 35 pounds. It was one we raised. We usually get 15 pound turkeys. And there are two less people this year at my house who can eat the turkey. I don't know what we're going to do with all that meat.**


	2. Day 2: S'not Your Normal Training Regime

Melanie watched with no small amount of disgust as her best friend and her boyfriend mixed chemicals and made things explode. Under normal circumstances, Melanie loved explosions. But when the explosions sent gooey green masses flying around the room, well, it wasn't very enjoyable.

"Natasha, why do I have to watch this?" Melanie asked the red-head next to her. The woman shrugged, not looking away from the airborne snot.

"Desensitization."

"What?"

"They want you desensitized to weird, disgusting things flying around. So that if you're in a combat situation and an enemy, or an ally, blows up and their guts go flying everywhere, you can keep fighting."

Melanie frowned. "The last combat situation I was in included me ripping aliens to shreds and flinging their insides around. Haven't I already been desensitized?"

Natasha shrugged.

"And besides, when I'm in combat situations, I'm a dinosaur. So, that would make this whole exercise rather redundant and pointless, wouldn't it?"

"Well, you look rather uncomfortable."

"Because a pound of snot green goo – which, by the way, I have no clue what it's made of – was given the ability to fly, and it decided to soar right into my face."

There was silence between the two women while another explosion went off, sending a huge glob of purple slime at them. It splattered, hitting them both. Melanie shuddered, hurrying to get it all off and fling it back at Tony, who was sniggering. It hit him in the face, while his mouth was open.

Natasha glanced at Melanie, not bothering to wipe the goo off herself. The blonde woman was doing a victory dance and laughing evilly at Tony, who was gagging.

"Yeah, I think this is done," Natasha muttered into her walkie-talkie, then sighed. "If she's here any longer, I can't make any promises on what won't happen."

**A/N: Yeah, so I know I totally lied when I said I'd update once a week. -_- I'm unreliable, and I'm sorry. I try, guys, I really do, but there's just so much to do! I know, I'm a disappointment.**

**But you've got another installment, and I'll get to work on the next few. And because I'm having horrible writer's block on my Cap story, it is being put on hiatus. In the meantime, I will work on this and the other story I've been working on. Yes, it is Avengers, and it involves copious amounts of sarcasm, bad jokes, sexual harassment, language, and violent women. As soon as I've gotten enough of it finished, I'll put it up.**

**Also, I fixed my computer, so I should be able to work more. Or not, we'll see. :D**


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